Finding my prime

Someone asked me recently if I considered myself in my “prime.”  Interesting question, however not easy to answer.  Looking backwards I think it’s safe to say that I look and feel better than I ever have.  One thing I have always lacked is self-confidence.   The image I had of myself growing up and into my twenties was horrendous.  I didn’t think I was capable of doing anything commendable or worthy of anyone’s time.  This perspective led to a lot of bad decisions, but one thing is for sure I learned from those experiences.  I’ve worked so hard on healing from the years of narcissistic relationships and moving as far away from my past as possible, that when I was asked this question, it literally stopped me dead in my tracks.  I realized I had been so focused on fixing and adjusting and pushing myself that I had neglected to pause and reflect on how far I’d come.  That one, simple-conversation-starter-question set my mind off on a whirlwind.  So yes, as I stand in front of the mirror today I am proud of what I see because I have become resilient.  I can post selfies all day and like what I see =) All joking aside, I still have lots of room for growing.  I don’t want to settle on this as being my best.  There’s still so much more time and so many more goals to reach.  One important thing to remember: don’t let anyone squelch your fire.  More than once I’ve been guilty of falling in love with someone who held me back from reaching my full potential.  I’d stiffled my goals and dreams for the sake of companionship.  The people you hold close to you need to be encouraging.   I believe people come into your life to help you shift into a new and more authentic version of yourself.  The most challenging people will present you with the best lessons, even if those lessons are only to see what you don’twant in your life.  There are also those who wonderously enter your life one day in such a harmonious coincidence and they will direct you to the fulfillment of your dreams.  I’m leaving my soap box now =) Just had to jot out this literary reflection.